I've got the joy!

Joy! Yes, that's right...last night Mr.Beckett had a huge poopy diaper on his own! And the nurse I just talked to at 5 am said he had a couple more poops on his own, with out a suppository! Yay for Beckett's plumbing! Hopefully we can move past this dismotility issue. Last night his heart rate was still hangin out around 181 to 188, but just now when I called it was 170s to low 180s...so I'm praying that its dropped back down to stay. Yesterday they gave him two bolus of saline to add to his fluid volume, to see if that might be the issue. It didn't help however. He had his CPAP hat and prongs changed, per routine,, they like to keep that hat nice and tight. He has been tolerating his 8 ml feeds too! Wahoo Big Boy! And he gained a little bit of weight, even with those poops! He now weighs 2 lbs 0.8 oz, and is 14 and 1/8 inches long.

He has had increased apneas and bradicardias a total around 6, with 2 of them needing stimulation, now when I say he needs stimulation, that means the nurse has to touch him, and that helps remind him to breathe, I hate watching these spells, you just watch him resting so peacefully, and then the monitor starts alarming, and those few seconds feel like an eternity..you can tell he is just forgetting to breathe....meanwhile mama prays that he would just remember already! Unfortunately, this is par the course growing up as a preemie. The brain is underdeveloped and his "forgetting to breathe" episodes are unfortunately normal. Remember he actually gets caffiene, yes, caffine to help decrease the amount of episodes. Crazy that straight up caffiene helps with this, but super thankful to whoever came up with this discovery. We joke that both he and Ellie must be following in the footsteps of the Gramkow side, as there are many coffee lovers! 

Beckett's oxygen just lately was bumped up to 35 percent which is the highest I believe its ever been. But the nurse also told me that it probably was because he had an episode that needed stimulation, and he hasn't fully recovered from that yet. His labs all came back fine, as far as electrolytes for his TPN. Tonight they will test his hematocrit, to see what his red blood cell count is indicating.

I got to hold him during his 2 pm feeding yesterday, and plan to again hold today...unless daddy fights me for another turn ;)

Please pray today for safe travel as Grandma Gramkow returns to Meade; Ellie as she is starting to get a runny nose...I'm not sure though it could be allergies...however, its really important that we all stay healthy since Beckett is severely autoimmune deficient; Beckett's heart rate to continue to go back down.

Ellie has been doing so well since Beckett has been born. She still occsionally asks if Baby Brother is still in mommy's tummy, but we have to keep reminding her that he is in the hospital, and gets to stay over night with his doctors. She asks to see him, and hold him, but we have to say, not until Christmas time when he comes home. She is going to be such a good helper. She loves playing with her dolls and feeding them! This is definitely harder this time around with Ellie at home. She needs her time too. And she is a good reminder of God's provision in our family. Sometimes she says just the right things. She has intuition even at age 3. She notices when mama is sad, and then proceeds to make mama happy again. She is such a joy to me. Both her and Beckett are such a joy to me. My husband also is such a joy to me.

Tonight Ellie and I made a few crafts for Beckett's room. She loves to do crafts! She also loves to sing. So tonight we sang the song (well, Ellie sang and did an interpretive dance with it...Aunt Wendy, you know what I'm talking about) "I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart. Where? Down in my heart, Where? Down in my heart...and I'm to happy so very happy, I've got the love of Jesus in my heart...over and over again.

Down in my heart to stay. What a refreshing reminder. Amidst all this crazy, I'm so thankful I can still experience joy.